Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
