Buhtt sex?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
