Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
