I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize