actually, I'm a sock model
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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