I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
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