Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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