At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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