Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
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