I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
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She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
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I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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