2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
