...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
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Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
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Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
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