Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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