SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
