My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
