so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
