shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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