grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
