just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
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