I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
