I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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