Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
