Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
