I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Be still, my beating vagina.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
