What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
