I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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