i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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