maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
