Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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