that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
