I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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