What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize