i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
