STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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