So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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