he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize