my mouth tastes like poor choices
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
