I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
This is my gift to your gina
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
