If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
