I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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