Your mouth is God's brothel.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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