Moan for me like Helen Keller
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize