Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Randomize