Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
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