You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
