is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Two words: blizzard sex
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
