2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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