He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
So much Jack, so little girl.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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