That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
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just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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