I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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